Friday, 11 February 2011

Girl Talk

‘A daughter may outgrow your lap, but she will never outgrow your heart.’

I have heard it said that we lose our daughters for a time during their teenage years but that if we keep the door open, they will come back to us.

My eldest daughter is 16 and we have had our fair share of dramas since she became a teenager but I have always tried to keep the lines of communication open, even when I could have happily strangled her. We have had tears, tantrums and disappointments but we have, on the whole, kept talking.

Lillie has often been moody, uncooperative and, at times, completely unrecognisable from the angelic little girl I loved as a child but every now and then I catch a glimpse of the woman she will become.

Relationships have been ill stared in our house this week and Lillie has had an ongoing argument with the LTB (long term boyfriend). In spite of the slamming doors, late night calls and red eyes, I have been largely unaware of the source of the problem. Until yesterday.

Seeing that she was unhappy, I took a cup of tea and some chocolate biccies up to her room, expecting to leave her to it but she wanted to talk. And I listened.

We sat for over an hour discussing relationships and life in general. Gone was the unpredictable teenager we had been living with for the past week and in her place was a sensible, intelligent young woman who was dealing with things in a mature way.

We ended up giggling on her bed and it felt like spending time with a close friend.

This morning, Lillie was back to stomping around her bedroom and scowling. The moment had passed.

But I have looked into the future and there is reason to be optimistic.


  1. That is so lovely, MiM. Kids of all ages are a challenge and it sounds as though you are doing all the right things for this particular age and stage. She's lucky to have you!

  2. Thanks Paula. It is often challenging having teenagers in the house so it is lovely when you can be close to them for a while. You can't fight alltheir battles only try to instill enough values and common sense so that they are equipped to cope on their own.